“I Cant Stop Thinking About Her”- 12 Effective Recommendations
Psychotherapists say that our constant “thinking” about a person can be chemical reactions in the brain, especially if your obsession is related to someone you have recently met. When we find a connection with a person, it results in the release of dopamine in the brain, which creates a pleasant sensation.
Each of us has repeatedly caught ourselves thinking: “why cant I stop thinking about her?”. Of course, no one forbids thinking, but often our thoughts cross all boundaries. A lot of people when free from relationships, instead of rejoicing at new opportunities, become depressed, self-flagellate, begin to regularly drink alcohol, and do other indecencies. What can be done to stop the constant flow of thoughts about a person? Are there reasons for this? Read more about it.
4 Main Reasons on “Why Cant I Stop Thinking About Her?”
Obsessive thoughts about a person can drive you crazy. Why can’t you stop thinking about her? Let’s figure it out.
1. Falling in love
Attraction can take many different forms. We may be drawn to a certain person physically, emotionally, spiritually, intellectually, or all of the above. Often the inability to understand what exactly attracts us in a person makes us think about it again and again.
Do you like her because she is visually attractive? Or maybe she is smart and charismatic? You need to answer these questions and more to understand why you can’t get her out of your head. In addition, we are most often attracted to those who do not immediately reciprocate our feelings and over the conquest of which we need to make an effort.
2. This person is a mystery to you
If you think about a person all the time, most likely, she is an absolute mystery to you. In this case, you are not necessarily attracted by the person, but by the very desire to unravel what it is. Some people are more reserved and mysterious by nature, and if you are curious enough, you can literally drive yourself crazy thinking about this person. The more you communicate, the more understandable this person will be to you, and the less obsessive thoughts will visit you.
3. You subconsciously experience frustration or resentment
Why cant I stop thinking about her when I have a girlfriend? If you keep checking your ex-girlfriend’s page to check what’s going on in her life, it’s a sign that something is out of your conscious control. This is especially true if you’ve blocked or unfriended her.
Perhaps your friends and family are already tired of hearing about her, but you still want to talk about this person. You’ve tried every option to get over her, but any broken heart takes time to heal. It is important not to judge yourself harshly because disappointment is very difficult to deal with alone.
4. You are mad at her
”I cant stop thinking about her but im married…”It also happens that we think about a person not only because she offended us, but also because we are angry with her, and we don’t have the opportunity to tell her about it.
If you feel such a desire, do it. Speak from your heart, let the girl know that she hurt you. If you accumulate anger in yourself, it can end in an explosion of emotions and lead to a nervous breakdown.
If you don’t want to talk about it, let it go. Realize that the person hurt you, and what could have caused it, and move on. When you forgive someone, you free yourself.
How to Stop Thinking About Her?
First of all, you need to gather your will into a fist and tune in to decisive action: you have a lot of work to do. The sequence of the following steps can be changed, and the actions themselves can be combined:
1. Understand that it is impossible to stop loving in a second
Just accept this fact: if the feelings were real, then it will take longer than 2-3 days to be sad that the relationship has ended. That’s okay! Remember: love is the greatest gift in life, and if you experience it, it’s wonderful.
Unfortunately, love alone is often not enough to build a happy relationship. Then you have to part. But this does not mean at all that you should immediately stop loving or hating your ex-girlfriend. So stop beating yourself up for worrying about where she is and with whom, even after a breakup. It will pass, but everything has its time.
2. Get distracted by something else
Keep yourself busy so that you don’t have time to think about her. This is the most obvious way to start forgetting your ex, but it works! Take this energy that destroys you and redirects it to another channel.
Do at least something: join a gym to improve your body, start writing a book, develop an app, start taking some classes, go to the pool, develop a business plan, or at least start actively growing your TikTok account. You’ll see, soon your thoughts will concentrate on new tasks and your ex-girlfriend will be forced out of them.
3. Remember everything that was bad between you
Often, dudes idealize their exes after a breakup. You can just go about your business, and suddenly you suddenly remember some kind of your joke or a cute date. You smile sadly, remember her words and for the first time in a long time remember how you had sex. Only not this! One of the most important tips is to remember the bad. Concentrate on your problems and quarrels. Go over in memory her bad habits and ugly behavior. It acts like a cold shower.
4. Avoid her friends and places she goes
If you do not want to succumb to the temptation that inevitably accompanies any meeting with the former, you must be ready to make some kind of sacrifice. You will have to cut ties with your mutual friends. Yes, you will have to avoid places that you both liked. Believe, it’s worth your peace of mind.
5. Go in for sports
Without it, you free up a lot of time, and you will think about how to fill it. Now that you’re single, it’s time to go to the gym or start jogging in the morning. This is a great way to stay in shape and avoid depression after a breakup. Being in shape also means increasing self-esteem. Don’t forget: the gym is like a dating site: a great place to meet girls.
6. Cut off all contact with her
You’ve talked, said everything you think, and now, if your goal is really to forget about her, it’s time to cut all ties with her. This does not mean that you should, as a teenager, block her on all social networks and unfriend her. I cant stop thinking about her Reddit: just stop scrolling through all of her stories and posts, scratching your head with potential comments you won’t leave, maniacally looking for opportunities to sneak a peek at her, drive “accidentally” past a girl’s house, text her friends, to find out all about her affairs. If the temptation to follow your ex-girlfriend at least on social networks is too great, leave them altogether. A little digital detox never hurt anyone, especially in a situation like this. Messengers will remain to communicate with those who did not break your heart.
7. Work on yourself
Instead of starting a new relationship, take care of yourself. Surviving stress, and coping with feelings and emotions is easiest when you simply do not have time for them. Buy a gym membership, start learning foreign languages, go on a trip with friends, finally get promoted, and find singing/drawing/oratory courses. It doesn’t matter what you do in your free time, just don’t lie on the couch with a bottle of beer, beating yourself up.
Start living for yourself. Healthy selfishness has never hurt anyone. Do as much as possible for yourself, and your loved one – this will allow you not to get hung up on the image of the former. Develop and become cooler, let your ex bite her elbows, not you.
8. Clarify everything for yourself
If you broke up, you should be at about the same stage. Don’t put it off. Both you and she are moving on, which means you will meet new people. If you still need to dot the i’s, do it now. Then it will be stupid.
9. Drop thoughts of returning
If you’re feeling lonely, try channeling your energy into something productive. For example, when you have free time, go for a run or do yoga. No need to make a plan to return to a person who does not appreciate you. We constantly want to go back and do it right all over again, but that’s usually a bad idea.”
10. Spend more time with your family
After a breakup, especially if the relationship was long enough and severe, you will miss love, attention, and care. It’s time to remember that no one will ever love you more than your family. Perhaps you have a girlfriend and you think: “Should I tell my gf I cant stop thinking about her?” If you do not want to make your girlfriend uncomfortable, we advise you not to tell her about it. Just work on yourself and soon you will stop thinking about your ex. Immerse yourself in your current relationship, if you love your significant other, you should forget about the former.
11. Remind yourself why the relationship fell apart
Think about why things didn’t go according to plan. You will definitely be able to give the correct answer. More often than not, we idealize the people we miss. We overlook the fact that the importance we placed on relationships has not always been as important as we would have liked.
12. Change something in life
This is the most radical advice that works great. You can find a new job, and new friends, if you are feeling lonely, move to another city, and every restaurant, traffic light, asphalt tile, and shop in the park will not remind you of bright days with your ex. Get a dog – of course, it will not replace your girlfriend, but the dog will never deceive, betray or leave. While you save the wires, slippers, and bags from the puppy, the experience will go by the wayside. Buy or rent a new apartment. Change car. Let this painful breakup motivate you to change your life and become cooler, and not condemn you to suffer and alcoholism.
Do not think about the past, in order to maintain mental health, you need to learn to be aware of what is happening now in your current circumstances. By following these simple rules, you can quickly forget her and stop thinking about her. Love yourself and enjoy life!